How to Suck at Life / by Simeon Smith

I want to get good at life. All of it. I want happiness, health, and productivity. I want to create. I want to get good. 

So I wrote this post to remind myself of what never to do, ever.

Unless I want to suck at life, that is. 

Don’t let go of anything - Your past is what defines you. No one changes. Not really, anyway. And you definitely have no right to change your mind about anything. Your values, habits and routines should be what they’ve always been. Don’t try new things, they’ll only disappoint you. Focus on the past, and walk backwards into the future. 

Your reputation is everything. Spend time reflecting on what others think of you. You cannot objectively see who you are, or what your intentions are, you can only truly view yourself through the eyes of others. And the most important thing you can take away from any interaction with another person is their criticism. Those remarks, they’re loaded. They totally had subtext.

Aim for complicated relationships. Everyone in your life has expectations of you, and you have unspoken duties to each and every one of your friends and colleagues. They’re not people, they’re resources to further yourself in life. If they’re not meeting your demands, you’re not manipulating them well enough. If they don’t respond to you, don’t forget about them, instead keep them around to punish them. 

Ignore your emotions. Instead focus on what you should be doing, rather than what you want to do. Your reputation, honour, and integrity depend on this. 

Your body isn’t important, just your mind. Sport is for small-minded, commoners. You’ve got to be really vain to want to control your diet. Besides all these diets and exercise regimes are just fads anyway. They never work. 

Don’t try.

Suck at life. 

All photos taken from a film swap a couple of years ago I did with Hannah Brown. 

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